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Okay, I'm starting from Day One and working my way forward. So if you want a day-by-day account, my Italian adventure began on the 20th and ended on New Year's Day. I'll try to add stuff asap.
Safe and SoundWow! There's so much to talk about I feel intimadated about even beginning! So let me start by saying Italy was incredible. It was an adventure, a challenge, a joy, a sorrow, rollercoaster ride of emotions and worth every minute!
So since I'm not sure where to begin, we'll start with...the beginning. Friday the 20th--The DepartureSince we had a gig on Thursday, all my packing was done on Friday. I'd hoped to go up and stay with a friend in Dallas, but by the time I got off my arse to contact them, I felt it'd be too much of an inconvienence. So I decided to pack, drive up there, and crash in the airport.
Unfortunately, I was so tired from a sinus infection and lack of sleep that it was a challenge. I got stuff together and took off. An hour out I was having a horrible time staying awake, so I began calling people on my cell phone. Most weren't available, but I did manage to get in touch with Tom, the DJ from Celtic Core on KEOS 89.1 FM in College Station. I knew he was broadcasting that night, so he and Melanie helped me out tremendously by giving me a frequent phone calls to make sure I was awake.
Finally, I made it up to the terminal. Parked my car. And with crutches from my sprained ankle, two big suitcases, an autoharp and a Brobdingnagian Bard tote bag, I stumbled up to check in at about 1am. And everything was closed! Ugh!
So I hobbled back down to the car and decided to find cheaper parking and maybe a hotel to crash at. Hotel prices didn't suit me, so I found remote parking and called a friend to give me a wake up call. I passed out as best I could. Saturday the 21st, The Adventure BeginsTurns out I didn't need that. At 5:30 am, my mom calls. She's on the Autostrada in Italy shouting that her car blew up! Well, she's a bit overdramatic at times, so I knew she meant it was broken down. Appears white smoke was fuming out of the engine while she was driving up there. She had no transportation, and we were days away from Christmas when EVERYTHING closes down. The only solution was for me to take the train when I arrived in Frankfurt.
Well, I was up and awake so I picked up my luggage and shuffled to the bus terminal and caught a ride to the airport terminal to hop my flight on Northwest Airlines. Then the nicities began.
After exiting the bus and trying to take the escalator (which was not running), some amazing woman saw my dilemna and helped me to an elevator. She then grabbed the only available luggage carrier--a wheelchair. And we hobbled to the counter. Then the lap of luxury began.
They brought out a person to push me around in my wheelchair. I was first in line for security check and made it through smoothly. But I started to feel like a fraud. Yeah, I know I couldn't move well, but sheesh, I'm being chauffered around and getting all these priority priviledges. Wow!
Well, they dropped me off at the terminal and then I rolled myself over to grab a breakfast smoothly and a brioche. Then rolled back to watch the airline news and try to sleep. Sleep was pretty unsuccessful. So I just bided my time until the flight. Then the real fun began. Music for the SkiesHave you seen The Wedding Singer? You remember at the end when Adam Sandler has to get a First Class ticket and then tells his whole story before singing a song to Drew Barrymore over the intercom. I think the song was "I Want To Grow Old With You." Well, I felt like Sandler.
Right before boarding, they called me up to the counter and upgraded me to First Class! Aw yeah! Then they wheeled me down the ramp where I got to sit next to an FBI Agent. Then, the stewardess, curious about the autoharp, asked me to play, and I did. It was such a rush.
Yes, they really do let you do ANYTHING in First Class! ;)
Then there was this wonderful lunch. Again, I felt I was totally cheating the system.
Well, at long last, I arrived in Detroit, and Northwest had someone meet me at the gate. Then he drove me across the huge International Airport to my terminal for my four hour wait before my flight to Germany took off.
Since I had some time, I called up a couple people and used the last of cellphone battery chatting and then looked around. Wheeled myself down to a cafe and had lunch--Guiness and Nachos.
Still had some time afterwards, so I began playing my autoharp in front of the terminal. Started practicing my Christmas songs. And lo and behold, people began flocking near me. I love how people do that and seem to enjoy my music so much. One guy sat down near me. He was an American living in Germany who was fascinated by the autoharp and the music. Course, I had the sad realization that I've a long way to go to pick out melodies.
"So what are you playing?"
"Damn, you can't hear it? Ah well. Keep practicing!"
After a while, I started reading up on my new Canon S30 digital camera so I'd be prepared when I got to Italy. Practiced some new features, but didn't really keep many of those pictures.
Finally, it was time to leave. Once again, they rolled me down the ramp, and I was boarded on the plane. I did my best to sleep as much as possible, and think I did a pretty could job. Totally missed the movie, "Scoobie Doo" which sucks cuz I love that movie. But I needed the rest, especially as little as I slept Friday night.
I woke up a few hours later and thought about our Tolkien CD, Memories of Middle Earth for quite a while. Eventually, I got bored and so decided to listen to some music. I plugged in the headphones, turned the knob twice and heard a blues song. I then took off my headphones and started writing a comical Tolkien Blues song. Here's the initial version: The Psychopathic, Chronic, Schizophrenic Gollum BluesOld Bilbo found a ring.
It was the One Ring of the Dark Lord.
Old Bilbo found a ring.
It was the One Ring of the Dark Lord.
Now that twisted freak Gollum
Is hunting me cuz he's bored.
I got the Psychopathic, Chronic, Schizophrenic Gollum Blues.
I got the Psychopathic, Chronic, Schizophrenic Gollum Blues.
And if Smeagol don't betray me.
Then the world as we know it is doomed.
Sarum tortured Smeagol
But the slimy runt got away.
I said, Sauron tortured Smeagol
But the slimy runt got away.
Now he's eating Conies with me
Wondering if Sam and I are gay.
I got the Psychopathic, Chronic, Schizophrenic Gollum Blues.
I got the Psychopathic, Chronic, Schizophrenic Gollum Blues.
And if Smeagol don't betray me.
Then Sauron will make the Headline News.
He tooks to the gates of Mordor
And then he said, "They ain't no way!" ["Are you crazy. They ain't no way"]
He tooks to the gates of Mordor
And then he said, "They ain't no way!"
Said, "I'll take you to meet Shelob,
And she'll make you a hobbit filet."
I got the Psychopathic, Chronic, Schizophrenic Gollum Blues.
I got the Psychopathic, Chronic, Schizophrenic Gollum Blues.
And if Smeagol don't betray me.
The Dark Lord'll make hobbits wear shoes.
We climbed Mount Doom.
But the ring made me all whacked.
I said, we climbed Mount Doom.
But the ring made me all whacked.
So Gollum bit the ring off
And did a Swan Dive in the Crack!
I got the Psychopathic, Chronic, Schizophrenic Gollum Blues.
I got the Psychopathic, Chronic, Schizophrenic Gollum Blues.
And if Smeagol don't betray me.
Then I'll never take an Elven Cruise!
Posted by Marc Gunn on Friday, January 03, 2003 |
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Irish Drinking Songs for Cat Lovers
