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Murphy's Law Takes OverDang that bloody law! Yeah, two days ago I'm running down some steps, and I sprained my ankle like a fool. Right before I leave for Italy too! Blast it all! Ah well. That'll teach me. I don't know What it'll teach me, but I can hope.
Well tonight I leave for Italy. I've got a long road ahead. I'm driving up there as soon as I finish packing. Hit the cruise control and then crash in the DFW airport so I don't miss my flight. Meantime, I'm all set with a new camera that kicks arse. And I'll be bringing my autoharp for an Italian jam session, my personal journal and, of course, the Lord of the Rings to read since it looks like I wont' be able to SEE the movie until next year, blast it!
So tell me if I forgot anything and wish everyone a wonderful holiday season! Don't know if I'll be writing here or not. Hope to, but no guarantees, and I don't want to spend all my time on a computer too!) Take care!
Posted by Marc Gunn on Friday, December 20, 2002 |
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Ah! What beautiful seventy-degree weather we're having. So much so, I was inspired to write a song. Christmas Time In TexasThere's no white Christmas day
Unless you drive a white Chevrolet
In your...Christmas time in Texas.
You won't hear sleigh bells ring
Unless Salvation Army is Santa-ing
In your...Christmas time in Texas.
The weather is not grey,
It's a bright sunny day
In your...Christmas time in Texas.
So lift your head in cheer
As you wrastle down a steer
In your...Christmas time in Texas.
The sun is shining bright.
Don't expect snowflakes tonight.
And if you hear a man in your chimney,
He's probably stuck. It's warm, your flue is shut
During Christmas time in Texas.
So don't bother with Christmas lights.
Buy your cold winter clothes half-price.
In your...Christmas time in Texas.
And if you feel the holiday blues,
Go outside with no shoes
In your...Christmas time in Texas.
The sun is shining bright.
Don't expect snowflakes tonight.
And if you hear a man in your chimney,
He's probably stuck. It's warm, your flue is shut
During Christmas time in Texas.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Tuesday, December 17, 2002 |
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Before SunriseLast night, I watched Before Sunrise again. That's one of my all-time favorite movies. Actually, in many ways it reminds me of my journal here, but with some great cinematography!
If you're not familiar with it, it stars Ethan Hawke as an American on vacation who meets Julie Delpy, playing a Parisian on her way home from visiting family. They meet on the Eurorail and end up spending an evening together in Vienna before Ethan Hawke's character must hop a plane back to the states.
It's a very simple but in depth story. The time constraint gives them the vehicle to talk about any and everything and nothing too, from romance to family, politics to hopes and dreams. A lot of it is sort of pointless stream-of-conscious conversation, but it's deep conversation nonetheless, the type that makes you think.What is life all about? Are we just looking for love? What made you the way you are? And again, it's topped with some absolutely beautiful images of Vienna. Seriously, if you enjoy my journal, I think you'll love this movie. I Know What You're Thinking...The more time I spend single, the more I realize how important it is to know what someone is thinking. I really cherish hearing people's thoughts, for better or worse. Games are just so pointless to me. But despite these facts, it is difficult for me to communicate with people who aren't very communicative.
Before I met my ex-fiancee, I made the List. You know, it's that thing they had on Happy Days describing the ideal woman, what I hoped and prayed for. Well, knowing how little I talk. in general, one thing on that list was someone who didn't mind talking more than I did, while still being open to hearing my thoughts as well. My Ex- was great at that. But now, that time has passed, I don't know if that's entirely necessary as long as communication is free and easy.
Sometimes, I feel stressed trying to figure out what to say next. That frustrates the hell out of me! This happen especially when the other person doesn't talk much themselves. It casts doubt on any potential. And a person who doesn't talk much makes it more difficult for me to talk much.
But something happened recently that rose a new question. What happens when there's nervousness or shyness on both parts? Could it be possible that you could give up on someone altogether because of a lack of communication due to shyness? Miss out on something great because someone is not a great communicator when you just meet?
I wonder how many times two people have met, felt no great connection, so they gave up and move along? Despite the fact that with a wee bit o'time, they would be jabbering up a storm and never know when to quit? I don't know. I guess there's no way to really tell how this could happen. Just hope and pray. Maybe even change the circumstances of your meeting to something more comfortable for them? Maybe that's the answer. Or maybe there just isn't one. Before SunriseBefore sunrise,
I dreamed of you.
We met and laughed,
A time I won't forget.
Our evening
It was spent in frustration
But joy was there all the while,
And it made me feel like a boy.
Time flew
By, and I'll always remember
The smile you wore on your face
When I sang songs old as the Nile.
The images
Of you and the magnificent world all
Around burned the hopes and dreams
We shared and spurned.
I don't know
What my future has in store when you board
That train, or if we'll see each other
Again once I exit my plane.
Past hurts
Still dwell, though I wish them away.
They taunt me with what-might-have-been
If we'd stayed in our old haunts.
My love
Though, still grows stronger each day,
Never wanes despite my longing and wondering
From whence comes the pain.
So how
Do I heal and move forward to
Love anew? It seems even knowing this is not enough
For me to give up on you.
Each morn,
I will wake and look out on the
Rising sun and pray for a new day to tell me
My choice was the right one.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Tuesday, December 17, 2002 |
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Oh, Give Me A Home, Where the Gondoliers Are Rowed...Italia! Am I there yet? I'm getting really excited. I had a wonderful weekend outdoors and watching movies, and eating delicatable pastas, and now I'm ready to go off to the boot across the ocean.
I want to eat Asiago cheese. I want to see snow-topped mountains, drive through mountain passes. I want to smell the fresh Italian mountain air and hear cow bells. I want to walk among buildings that are centuries old. I want to smell the flowers in the markets. I want to drink Lavazza! I want to have jam session with Italians. I want to write music. I want to take photos of things you just don't see anywhere else in the world. I want to walk through fields. I want Fiat's to pass us at 60mph in three-foot visibility fog. I want to play with my Pekingneses and cats. I want to curl up and read under my mothers airy afghan. I want to wander the markets of Cammisano. I want to eat Bracciola and drink San Pelligrino acqua. I am ready to return to Italy!!!
A part of me just wants to jump train and leave it all behind. Live forever like a good Italian son...with his mother. ;)
But I can't deny the fact that our music is progressing forward and I want it to continue to do so. I am aching to make music my livelihood. So for now, I must just take a break to plan for our next move, to feel inspired to book gigs that will propel our music careers forward and inspire others in the process. For now, I will just rest relax and pray.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Monday, December 16, 2002 |
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Digital Cameras and SushiWell the digital camera is all but mine! Woohoo! I can't wait. Gonna cost a wee bit more than I cared for, but I'm happy to have it nonetheless.
Show last night went great! Had a bit o'fun. I'm looking forward to playing there on Fridays next month since it'll give us a chance to put on a weekend gig for a change and maybe get some better traffic through the door.
I used to say that anyone will enjoy our music if they take the time to listen, especially to our live show. It's a kinda community affair among friends. But I like to think we put on a good performance too. And that's what really shines about it, methinks. So it's fantastic to find people like those at Sake on Sixth who are willing to put it to the test.
It's kinda funny actually. During our first year together, Andrew and I were hired by the International Students Association (I think that was the name) at UT. We played to a very receptive audience that included a lot of Asians. End of the evening, several came up to us and told us how much they enjoyed our music and that much of it sounds like traditional Asian music! That was mind-boggling. But we're happy to take it! Alone With A CatWe've been neglecting Jasper recently. He's been home all alone and now that my Ex is no longer there, and I'm out much, it's been tough on him. Meanwhile, he still seems to have a cold left over from last week's illnesses.
It's really weird being alone again. One of the things I miss was having someone to talk to in the morning. Mind you, I'm not a morning person. So I don't really like to talk much in the morning, but a wee bit is always nice. Especially since I could very easily go through an entire day at work and never say a word. That just ain't healthy!
So it looks like I'm gonna starting having to go out of my way to talk to people. Found it especially tough last night. I was really out of it, mentally. I was talking to one person who was a wee bit intoxicated, and she was starting thing it was her power of speech that was affected. But no, it was my power of comprehension that was lacking. You'd think that I was drunk!
Any case, I guess I need to start taking my breaks at work. And not let myself get stuck in front of the computer like an addict...and today's poem.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Friday, December 13, 2002 |
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I'll Trade You!I'll trade you!
My addictions for yours?
I'll give you my addiction to chocolate,
Like M&Ms, Lindt and those orange chocolate balls.
You give me your addiction to caffeine,
Like cappucino, Dr. Pepper and Coke Floats.
"That sounds fair."
I'll give you my addiction to spending
On clothes, computers and a cool new camera.
You give me your addiction to eating
Pasta, sushi and chips'n'salsa.
"That sounds fair."
I'll give you my addiction to thrill sports
Like surfboarding, scuba diving, and jumping out of airplanes.
You give me your addiction to sleeping
In your office, at the airport and on your way up the stairs.
"That sounds fair."
I'll give you my addiction to cleaning,
Neurotically spot cleaning every inch of the house.
You give me your addiction to sex
In the office, in the bed and from behind.
"That sound fair."
I'll give you my addiction to alcohol,
Like Guinness, Loki and Orvieto White Wine.
You give me your addiction to drugs
Marijuana, smack, and anything else to make me high.
"That sounds fair."
What's a simple trade of addictions
Between good friends like you and me?
Doesn't sound right? Give it some time, and you'll see
Our addictions are all that we need.
"That sounds fair."
Posted by Marc Gunn on Friday, December 13, 2002 |
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Apartment Starting to Look Like a HomeI had a great evening last night. I was home alone and spent it cleaning, rearranging the furniture and watching Return to Me.
I love the movie! It's a sweet tear jerker which are my favorite types of movies. I'm a major sap, especially for romantic comedies. Those are my first choice any day. And this one is not only a romantic comedy, but a tear jerking one at that!
Course I missed out on the Whole effect as I setup my home studio in the study. This morning I was talking with my mom about the advantages of being single. And this is definitely one. I have sooo much more room now. I almost don't know what to do with myself. But I do know I have more places to put junk. That's for sure.
But now the study is setup so I can work on the computer and watch TV in the living room. :) I know it's pathetic, but I always liked out Andrew and one of his friends had their place setup like that. I love watching TV. Rather, I love watching movies. One day, maybe I'll get better cable, but for now, I'll just get a DVD player. :) I'll have a camera for Christmas. You can count on it... Actually, I think the DVD player will have to wait. I asked my dad for camera for Christmas, in particular the Canon S30. He has one and says it's fantastic. Long, long ago, I took some photography courses. I was using my Granddad's Topcon back then. It's 35mm SLR from the late 60s. Went out of business sadly. And worse, it has no autofocus. For someone with bad vision, that stunk!
So hopefully, with this, I'll get to take a lot of great photos that I'll share from Italy. Haven't in the least looked into any gigs yet. So photos from gigs (Rie), might not happen, if I don't have any gigs. Ah well, we'll see.
But I was thinking about turning photography into a new hobby since I desparately need one. And it's kinda fitting considering since I do so much with graphics at work and on my computer... Hmm?? That reminds me. I've been needing to design the new Tolkien CD cover. Mayhaps I can find some great photos to use from Europe?? Home studio recordingAny case, while watching Return To Me I got the studio in working order and recorded a couple new songs that I love. One is called "The Pig's Song". I relistened to the one I uploaded a couple days ago and wasn't too thrilled with the reverb. So I redid it last night with a much better sound. I also record "The Barrel Song", also known as "Paddy's Sick Note" or just "The Sick Note". It's a very funny almost cartoonish Irish song that I learned a cappella, so sang a cappella.
As much as I'm loving the a capella recordings, I am going to start recording more live stuff with autoharp too. The new studio setup is fantastic for that, and the other advantage of living alone, I can record any time of day without working about waking someone up! :D This makes me very happy. Maybe then I can finally finish a solo album... or for that matter some of these long-waited bard albums.
Hopefully, by then end of this week, I'll have a nice clean house. Then people can come visit, and I can record many new songs and often.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Thursday, December 12, 2002 |
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Here's another poem I wrote this weekend on letting go at the end of a relationship. Latch OnLatch on.
Don't let go.
Hold tight.
I'll help you to float.
Floation device.
Life guard.
Buffeted around.
Staying up is ever so hard.
Go down.
Sink into me.
I'll be your air.
Then you will never be free.
Why him?
Who is next?
And you?
Will you get undressed?
Not me.
But I'm here.
In time of need,
I'll help you through your fear.
Don't latch on.
Not to me.
I must sail alone,
If I will ever enjoy reprieve.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Thursday, December 12, 2002 |
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Spock Is A ScotI had a t-shirt long ago that read just that. I loved the shirt, but you know I never really knew what it meant until today!
I figured out while remember a live performance of Texas Scotsman, Ed Miller. Right before he sings a love song by Robert Burns. He'd begin by saying that the Scots aren't known to be romantic or affectionate (I must be an exception, but then, I never grew up there). Then he would say, "I have a friend in Scotland who loved his wife SO much, he almost told her."
So voila! Spock=Emotionless=Scottish! Well, well, took me long enough!
Posted by Marc Gunn on Wednesday, December 11, 2002 |
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What a dork I am!Excuse me. I have a horrible sinus headache and am feeling kinda fowl. Braw-kaw. Plus, ants are crawling all around my desk at work. TSS! And of course, I quite foolishly made the mistake of copying over my regular index page. Got a backup. Just not right now.
Well yesterday, my Ex moved out. My place is a total disaster, and I have a lot of cleaning to do before the weekend. Plus rearranging and I was still hoping to record. Fat chance! Okay, not entirely true. Last night, I recorded a few kids songs I grew up, including some lullabies. They should be posted soon on my mp3 page.
But it was quite an interesting day. After hitting the doctors for my sinus infection, I helped my Ex move. Heckuva lot of work. We're in the same complex, so there was a lot of driving and walking up and down stairs. I'm a wee bit sore today. Then of course, I stayed up much later than I should've, though I enjoyed every minute of it, chatting on the phone with a woman.
But this morning, I wake up, and I find myself lonely and confused. I guess some of the realization really started to sink in last night that my apartment will be empty, except for me, and for another month, Jasper. Then, it'll just be me.
...
Okay, there was more, but I decided my head hurts too much. Blast that barometric pressure playing racquetball with my head! Vote, Vote, VoteI'm kinda curious what kinda of poems people like. And which you don't like. Feel free to be brutally honest, and I'll share the results. But I'd like to ask you to vote for your favorite poems once a week when ye can.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Wednesday, December 11, 2002 |
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UncertaintyFive years we spent together.
Now we are apart.
And every step you take away
Becomes more painful to my heart.
I toss and turn at night from meds
And uncertainty
What's to become of you?
What's to become of me?
I gaze at you now
Through a wall,
And I don't even feel like
I know your thoughts anymore.
We once were connected.
Our thoughts and bodies were one.
But now I sit and stare
Out my window undone.
Our cat who we love so very much
Now is picking sides.
Our affection reaches out.
Our are hands stroke his sides.
The videos are now divided.
I lost my favorite flicks.
But worse than that I lost you,
And that is making me sick.
Then there's the other "problem"
That is now haunting my soul.
How do I love another
Without compromising our whole.
I feel myself falling.
Yet, I'm still in love with you.
And as the moments pass on by,
My tears flow too.
One is near, but far away.
The other far, but near.
One heart I often wish would stay.
The other becomes more dear.
A crossroad comes, yet still I flounder
As I see and meet more people.
But deep inside I long for a love
To walk with me under steeple.
For now the decision must wait.
I've much yet to learn.
Women to love, hearts to meet,
And memories to burn.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Wednesday, December 11, 2002 |
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What's The Use?Once again, a friend has been thrown into the pits of "What's next in store for me?" when she and her boyfriend broke up. That and my own questioning of "What are relationships all about?"
More and more as I live a single life, I hear the same questions. And I finally honestly opened up to myself that I want a long-term relationship. I want to find someone to love and cherish till death do us part. And that's what dating is all about.
Some I know, date and sleep with everyone they can get their hands on. But that to me seems like an immature response. I'm not saying I'm not that base, because lust gets the best of me too at times. But I do know that that is not my first choice. It's like, what's the real point of dating and sleeping with someone just because you're horny? Especially since sex only seems to cloud the subject.
I wonder how many more relationships would last if people who just hold off on the sexual relations long enough to really and truly, honestly get to know the person they're dating. I don't know. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe it's not just the sex? There's such a yearning by people that many times people jump into a relationship without even knowing the person.
My Ex and I met one day. Five days later went out on a date. A week later were inseparable. Portrait of an addictive relationship.
Of course, we learned of each other's faults, and they lost importance. But so to did the big issues. How many others do the same and casually forget about those important issues just for the chance to love and be loved?
I no longer feel afraid to be alone. I'm actually kinda looking forward to it. But it's certainly not something I wish on everyone. But I don't think it's until you are comfortable with being alone that you can really put your best foot forward.
I can't say I'm totally comfortable. But I'm not doing to bad. My Ex finally moves out today. So I'll have the place to myself very shortly. So give me another week, and I'll change my mind. ;)
I consider myself a Private in the ranks of the great Army of Low Self-Esteem. And as I've seen, it's a BIG army! But it's only through confidence that you can conquer the Enemy, yourself. So lift up your chin and stand strong, because that's me under your chin and if your chin falls, you might crush me!!!
Posted by Marc Gunn on Tuesday, December 10, 2002 |
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Oh, My Goth!I've been chatting a bit with a friend about Goth music. I admit it. I like some Goth. It's dark, depressing and sort of a cross between New Age Celtic and self-deprecating Alt Rock. Enya meets Alanis Morrisette or something like that.
To some degree, that's the kind of music I love the best. Though admittedly, I can't think of any Goth bands offhand that I adore. But some are kinda fun. Voltaire is one I enjoy. His Goth comedy, "The Vampire Club", first drew my attention at I-Con last year. But it was at Dragon*Con that I really heard a bunch of Goth bands. Since then, I've been pondering the idea of trying to record some semi-Goth songs. I don't know if I can write anything too depressing, but it'd be fun to try. But hey, maybe at least I can make fun of the whole Goth set?! :)
Posted by Marc Gunn on Tuesday, December 10, 2002 |
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Oh, FrustrationOh, frustration, I adore thee!
You build a fire in my loins.
You raise the heat in my heart.
You draw my love out in the open
And cut it down.
And I would have it
No other way.
My frustration is my salvation.
It is the road to love and peace.
My frustration is my guide on paths
I dare not remember to take.
Yet, you will bring into my arms a woman,
And she will press her body close to mine.
Her warm lips will send bolts of lightening
Streaking through my veins.
Her touch will magnify my frustration,
but free my passion.
She will free my soul.
I long for the morning when she will knock on my door
And we will tear down the electrons
our only wall.
I long to cook and cuddle
and sleep in her arms.
And her breath...her breathing as
we giggle and play.
And even then my friend frustration
will be with us.
He will protect us from ourselves,
And bring us closer to the God we love.
We will join our hands in frustrated bliss
While saying a prayer for the suspense to never end.
Though the miles may be distant,
Our love may grow,
Our hearts may caress our fingers and ears
In cerebral paradise
While unleashing the magic of Heaven.
This is the frustration I cherish.
This is the frustration that I love.
This is the frustration that will give me
peace as I fall asleep tonight,
Resting in frustrated peace forever.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Tuesday, December 10, 2002 |
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I Am The BelloI am the Bello,
The beautiful man.
I am strong and courageous and free of spirit.
I cannot be tamed.
I am the Bello.
I am Bello.
Beauty surrounds me.
Those who I meet, those who I love, those I greet,
Are astounded by me.
I am Bello.
I am Marc.
I am a friend of all.
When I feel weak, I will stand strong. I will stand tall.
I encourage those I love. And I am encouraged by them in return.
I am Marc.
I am a Child of God.
I am humble and meek.
I serve those around me. I am served by those I meet.
Let no one deny Christ's blessings in and of me.
I am a Child of God.
I am the Bello.
It is Christ who is beautiful in me.
I am naught without my Lord and Savior. I'm naught, but His.
If you love the beauty resounding in me, know Jesus, and
You will know the Bello.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Monday, December 09, 2002 |
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To Sail the Ocean BlueLittle known fact. Before I stepped on the illustrious path of the Geographer in college, I was studying to be a Marine Biologist. So how did I end up with a Geography degree?
Another of life's mysteries. Well, basically, I was sick of taking classes from crappy biology professors, and I heard Geography had some great teachers. And they did. But where did it all begin? Hawaii.
I remember growing up in Maryland. Whenever we went to the Boardwalk and beach, I'd come home with a horrible sunburn and suffer the consequences for several days later. It was fun, but was it worth it? Then we moved to Texas and would head down to Galveston. Boy, was that a lovely beach (sarcasm intended)! The beach was dirty with seaweed, litter and other unpleasantries. It didn't make beach life something I treasured. It wasn't until my parents moved to Hawaii.
Course just like my folks to move AFTER I graduated from high school! But I can't complain too much. I mean, I had great vacation spots. "Let's see, should I go to Italy or Hawaii on summer vacation. Tough decision." Yes, hate me.
But in Hawaii, I learned what the ocean was all about. I first fell in love with surfing, despite the fact that I only stood up on a board ONCE. I enjoyed a wee bit o' bodyboarding though. I also got to do some snorkeling and then the world opened up to me when I decided to take scuba lessons.
I was actually frightened of sharks and other denizens of the deep until I got under the water. Then all of a sudden, the world opened up. It wasn't a big frightening place. Sharks weren't trying to hunt me down. They were avoiding me. And that ticked me off!
The world was beautiful and quiet. Just the sweet sound of my own breath as I breathed on compressed air. The colors were amazing. The fish beautiful. The coral magnificent. Soon I was taken to a secret research center of one of his co-workers, where they train dolphins and porpoises to do special intelligence tasks for the military. And I hooked up with a Kamikazi friend who took me swimming across a shark breeding ground to visit the University of Hawaii's marine research center.
Yeah, I miss Hawaii a lot. I don't know what others imagine of it. More than likely luaus and hula skirts, and tanned women. But for me, those things weren't as interesting as the magical world that made up the ocean island of lush vegetation and stunning underwater eye candy.
That's one thing that makes going to Corpus Christi such a pleasure. I miss the ocean. And the Texas coast to me is not nearly as magical, it is still a pleasure to disappear in that world.
It reminds me actually of a movie made by Don Knox. I don't remember the name (I was just told it was The Incredible Mr. Limpet), but it started off in the real world, and then it moved into a cartoon world. But the transition came with the words, "I wish I was a fish." And sometimes I wish I was just than...Course I'd probably get eaten. But those are the challenges one must face. Corpus ChristiCold and wet
Water drips down my glasses.
The fog rolls over the water
My heart is joy and peace.
The sea gulls circle around my head
Waiting for drops o'cookie crumbs
While pelicans bathe on polls in the water.
My cough suppresses with joyful delight.
My butt gets wet on the steps.
Coke bottles and baby nipples decorate the ground.
While seagulls line up to sing.
It's a choir on the steps.
One seagull leads the song.
Others chirp in Gloria Deus to God's creation.
Five in line.
Five in song.
One singing the wrong way.
The fisherman and scampimen line the docks
Hawkin' the fresh shrimp they caught.
Scavenging birds circle with hope
For that one forgotten fish they can swipe.
The fog and rain are beautiful.
My clothes and shoes are wet.
I sing "Fiddler's Green" and dream
Of a simpler life on the seas.
I feel I better understand the song
Alone by the ocean I love.
I hear the swells rise and fall
And I know I'll soon be torn away.
But one day I'll return to the Body of Christ
And I'll sing in the old Irish way.
My new friends Cassidy, Connor and Geneva
Will cheer loud on that day.
The music will rise and fall with the crowd.
Lilting airs will circle our listeners heads.
Melodies will linger
And this happy singer
Will sail away with pleasant winds
To land that's green and plentiful
Where peace and harmony
music and song
will enshroud me like the
fine mist of rain that
falls softly on my cheeks.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Monday, December 09, 2002 |
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Not Much Time TodayOnly here part of the day since we've a gig in Corpus Christi this weekend. We'll be heading down there today. This should be a nice break. Cassidy's is a fun little pub that always seems to have a wee bit o'traffic of some sort. Four hours of almost non-stop music. I'm gonna be wiped out!
But tomorrow, we'll get to hit a movie or something and relax. That's the one thing I like about Corpus, we always have lots of time to relax, and I just don't do that enough. Okay, that's not entirely true. I've been relaxing quite a bit since faire ended. So much so that I'm not betting we'll have the Tolkien CD finished by the end of the month. Too much else is going on.
But I expect to complete my parts to three new songs in the next week...okay, that's the plan in any case. We'll see if I can accomplish it.
I just realized I have nothing that I really want to say, so I'll just run around on random tangents.
Let's see, Italy... Yes, I can't wait to head back.
Oh, quick note, I added a 'clean' translation to the poetry page of yesterday's poem.
My ma said we'll be hitting the German Christmas markets. And that's fine. I love going anywhere with my mom. She's a wealth of information. Sometimes, we'll hit the antique markets. I just follow behind her and listen as she goes off on ALL the amazing information about various relics. It's amazing! No doubt the Christmas market will be similar.
I just never got into shopping, but I remember one time, she and a friend got together in Gubbio, Italy, and holy moly! I was wiped out by the end of the day. How someone can walk up those many hills to say what seems like very little is beyond me. But they were masters together.
Now I did, once upon a time, play music in Germany. Heidelberg to be exact. It's a big college town with a great castle overlooking the city. I had my autoharp, I think before I got serious with it. Sat down on the tourist street and started playing some American folk songs. People seemed to enjoy it. I, on the otherhand, was terrified. I had never busked before in my life. And this was a totally new experience.
Eventually, a cop told me to move along though. Apparently, Heidelberg has strict rules about what times and where you can play music. Reminds of Strausberg. I went out with a girl last night who said that there they have arrows pointing which direction a car drives, bicyclists ride, and people Walk!!! That's mind boggling. She said she got some dirty looks from people when they walked in the wrong section.
That's amazing! I just can't imagine being quite so restricted by so many rules. Sounds amazingly oppressive.
The Italians do not seem very repressive at all, on the otherhand. Majorly laid back. I remember driving to France once, and we were boggled by the differences. In France, you have road construction that gets done. In Italy, it sits there for long spanses of time with workers by the side of the road with a bottle of wine. Well maybe not, that's what my mom was saying in any case. But nevertheless, things get done at an amazingly slow rate.
As beautiful and romantic as Italy appears, the beaurocracy is incredible. But it governs everything. Tiziano bought some land on the Brenta for his greenhouse and to later build a house since land is so sparse. Later, he found out that he was not allowed to build on the land because all land next to the Brenta must adhere to strict architecture codes or be old buildings.
The result... Build something anyways and pay a fine. Fines like that are almost the norm.
Well, I started to write a poem, but it was crap. Just not feeling the mood today. So instead, I'll jump up and down in my seat. *weeeeee* that was fun. Have a great weekend!
Posted by Marc Gunn on Friday, December 06, 2002 |
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Jasper's Better and I'm Off to ItalyGot home last night to find a sweet kitty tearing up my furniture as usual. Woohoo! I think...?
But I also forgot to mention the great news. This holiday season I'll be spending with my Mom in Italy!!!!
For those who don't know, despite my bardic connection to Scotland and the Emerald Isle, I find myself much, much closer to Italy. You see, my mom lives there. I had the fortune of graduating from Vicenza American High School on the American military base there. Italy has been a part of my life since 1985 when my mom first moved there.
I had the pleasure of working with my mom's husband, Tiziano, selling flowers in the markets of Italy. Go ahead, tell me there's a more romantic job than that!!!
All in all, I love Italy. But the funny thing is, a couple years ago, my Ex-fiancee and I made a pilgrimage back there. We were in Florence heading towards the Duomo and what on earth do we see? An Irish Pub!!!!
I guess it's no different than it is here, but it boggled my mind to see it. So I did a wee bit'o'research and found scores of Irish Pubs around Italy. That's when I decided it'd be the coolest thing in the world to do a tour of the Irish Pubs of Italy. That just sounds too cool.
Well, I'm gonna have about a week and a half in Italy. So I'm gonna start looking into possible venues. I really hope to be able to have at least one gig. But I have a lot to do to make it happen. So if you have an friends in Italy, tell them to drop by my website for how they can see me perform there. Bella ItaliaBella Italia!
La casa lontano via dalla casa,
Bella é la vita.
Vendendo i fiori nei mercati.
Bella é l'odore di merda nei campi.
Manco le vostre colline e montagne.
Manco i vostri fiumi.
Manco i vostri bambini con i sorrisi caldi e cuori amichevoli.
Ma presto, ritorno in Italia che amo.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Thursday, December 05, 2002 |
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Religion UpdateOkay, so I'm a little out of touch. It's been a while since I've been in school. I got an email saying some schools are actually teaching a wee bit about religion."Some schools are adopting the Core Knowledge program which, among many other things, explores the different religions of the world as a part of that countries' culture. It is not approached as teaching religion in schools--BIG no-no--but as a part of the social studies strand." I'm glad to hear they are teaching about them, but I do hope they go into the cultural aspects as well. I'd hate to think of people missing out on the joy of music of various religions...hmm? Poses some interesting thoughts though. I remember hearing an MP3 by the Dalai Lama at one point. But I've never really looked into some of the other cultures. I'll have to do some searching... Sick kittyYes, my kitty, Jasper is sick. Tss! He's been vomiting and moping around. Ye know, I never imagined that I would ever love cats as much as I love Jasper.
I was thinking about that the other night. What on earth am I gonna do when my Ex moves out and takes Jasper? I'll seriously miss having him around.
I still think of myself as a dog person and I'm longing for a Pekingnese, but unfortunately, I don't have the time to take a dog out for walks and all. So I'm sitting here wondering whether I should get a cat. I just don't know. I have, at least, secured visiting rights. Now if I can only get periodic custody. ;) Here's To My KittyHere's to my kitty,
a beautiful lad.
He's silky and sweet
with paws just like pads.
I craddle him in my arms,
while I stroke his sweet neck.
He lies in kitty heaven,
except when he's sick.
He runs around madly,
psycho kitty, quest que c'est?
Then he stinks up the bathroom
and walks far away
He lies on our counter
and purrs in bliss.
Then he'll nip at paws
to tell me he's pissed.
He lounges on my recliner,
knowing it's his to creak.
Then he stretches, then claws
up my antiques.
He'll fly through the air
to catch a thrown ball
And hide round the corner
to pounce on us all.
He's the sweetest of friends
and a thrill in my life.
And to think he was impounded
when we found him in strife.
I never wanted a cat,
but he's won over my heart.
Now how can we ever
live far apart?
Posted by Marc Gunn on Wednesday, December 04, 2002 |
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On ReligionThis morning I was driving in late to work and started singing a song my brother and friends had written...jeez it must've been around 1981 or so? It was a parody of the "The Twelve Days of Christmas". Only this one was for Hannukah. I don't remember all of it. I'll see if he does. But it got me singing another song that I learned in grade school which I now see is called "Come Light the Menorah".
It's a fun song, but what I really thought was kinda interesting is that I remember the song. Keep in mind I'm a Christian. So here's a wonderful Jewish song taught to me in grade school that this Christian still remembers... for that matter, more than most of the Christians songs that I learned as a kid ("Amazing Grace"...are there others? I don't think I really ever learned many outside of Christmas.)
So it occured to me, "Hmm? Maybe it would be beneficial instead of taking religion out of schools to put it in, but teach a wee bit about each." But of course, to be totally fair, that means teaching about some of the faiths that many people will not be interested in. Like my friend I was talking to yesterday who's a Celtic pagan.
Well, I can see the Sh*t hitting the fan with that one... Oy!
But nevertheless, I feel I benefitted greatly from learning about the Jewish faith. And I wonder if religion was taught more in schools, if it might dispel some of the religious prejudices that many in our country harbor.
I told my Celtic pagan friend that I had no interest in learning about her faith. Then I started to catch myself. What does that benefit me? How can I be strong in my faith if I don't know what else is out there. Not saying I want to have my faith "corrupted", but at the same time, religions of all sort have beneficial aspects.
I remember seeing a movie about Tibet. In it, some Sherpas were preparing to build a house. But before they could do it, they had to make sure that there were no living creatures on the ground where they were building. To them, life, of all sorts, is too precious. Every little worm, spider, or cockroach has its purpose in the grand scheme of things.
Admittedly, I don't hold animals in quite such reverence. Humans come first, then animals. But they are not the same whether we'll one day find out some thing more like in Star Trek IV or not. But then maybe that's a similiar prejudice that may one day be remedied. Nevertheless, that philosophy in Tibet, inspired me to try to treat all life as something precious and not to be wasted or destroyed. And whether it's a religious or cultural philosophy, I think it's good for the balance of nature.
I've been blessed with quite a bit of religious diversity through my life, and I think it's been very beneficial for my own faith. In college, I was a member of a student organization, United Campus Ministry, which embrassed all faiths. And we spent time learning about others, as well, as difficult as it might've been.
We had people talk about Muslims, cults, went to a Jewish Sabbath celebration, and even had a Moonie in our fold (we were so proud of our Moonie;). But the point was we embrassed faiths as different as they were from our own.
Yes, I've still a lot to learn. And I'll try to be open, now and then. We'll see how the day pans out before you approach me with a religious discussion, but I am always open to listen, learn and share my own beliefs. I hope you'll think about that too.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Tuesday, December 03, 2002 |
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Balance and HarmonyBalance and Harmony,
Justice's scales.
One for you. One for me.
Together, the system fails.
Roast beans and Tea leaves,
Coffee shop.
One mocha. One chai.
Together, we'll spend the lot.
Give and Take,
No need to share.
I have mine. You have yours.
Together, we have a pair.
Love and Friendship,
Sacrifice all.
All for you. None for me.
Together, the scales never fall.
Balance and Harmony,
Without any scales.
Love for you. Love for me.
Together, all else pales.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Tuesday, December 03, 2002 |
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I'm EasyI always thought it was kinda silly how more common the You've Got Mail phenomena has really taken the internet by storm with couples finding their "true loves" online! But as I start chatting with more people online, I realize it's not that odd and wonder how many other people are as easy as I am online!?
What do I mean? Well I realize that words turn me on. Chatting with people online can be a very erotic experience. In some ways, it's even easier to get turned on than offline communication! I know it may sound weird, but bare with me.
Online communication tears down barriers. Hell, if I was reading my journal to you face-to-face, I don't know if I'd be quite so open with what I tell in here. But although I know that there are people reading it, it doesn't seem as threatening as if you and I are talking together in person.
Consequently, I find myself free to flirt more. And women are free to respond more. I develop relationships with people I've never met, and hardly even talked to!
Course, I try to be careful with how much flirting I do even online, but those that I do flirt with...DANG! I get really turned on! It's really kinda freaky, even for me.
Because some of these people I develop a strong fondness for. I find myself wanting to jump in a relationship with someone I barely know. I don't know their personality traits or quirks. I don't know their good points or bad points. All I know is the few words we exhange in writing. And half the time, it's just fun flirting, which leads me to just wanting to bang sha-bang. But I think the worst part of it is that I sometimes still have trouble communicating in person.
By nature, I don't like to hurt people. I do all I can to avoid hurting someone. And sometimes that involves not telling the whole story. Or leaving out details...which ultimately may hurt someone in the end.
I think that was one of my biggest problems in my last relationship. I didn't communicate all my worries and fears. But I'm finding there are ways around that. And it involves constant prodding to get all the answers out of me and a well-established, "I'm open relationship."
One of my friends has done an exceptional job at saying, "No matter what you say, it won't hurt me." Sure it may, but she's done a good job at the very least of fooling me into believing it. So now, I feel like I can talk about ANYTHING with her.
Will it last? If she stopped saying those same words, probably not. Eventually emotions get in the way. But she continues to repeat the phrase, and so I find myself free to talk about Anything. I'm almost as free as I am with the poem I wrote below...talking about bladder problems...
But I love having that freedom. And I think it's one of the biggest ways for me to freely communicate my hopes and fears. And all it is, is knowing that I can be me...without putting on a show. Because while I'd like to be me, some times I find myself courting someone and all of a sudden I find that it's not the "true" me, because after all, I want them to like me.
One of the reasons people would've thought that my past relationship would've lasted forever was because we used to throw around compliments easily. Whereas Andrew has mastered impromptu jokes, I've mastered sweet impromptu compliments with someone I love.
And while my compliments are all sincere, I think they create a sorta mystical force around the relationship... like it's the perfect relationship. Because she feels good and has her self-esteem stroked, and I feel good complimenting her. All of a sudden, some of the other issues in life are forgotten. But some of those issues are essential to the survival of your relationship.
It's a tough balance. But that's why it becomes ever more important to create a "yes, you can tell me Anything" feeling. Then there's no more games, which really annoy me after a while. It's just the most open kind of honesty. Where she realizes,"If it hurts me, that is my choice to be hurt. But it won't hurt me unless you don't tell me. So please tell me Everything."
I think my biggest worry is when I'm dating other women. I don't feel right talking about other women to other women, but ye know, sometimes that's all I have to talk about. I'm really not the most talkative person in the world. I've spent so much time focusing on music and music promotion these past few years that there's not much else. My latest hobby has been dating women as I'm able. So it's always nice to be able to speak freely about other women I'm seeing, but again, I hate building the feeling of jealousy.
True it's the woman's choice to be jealous or not, but I still feel the reprecussions. So I don't like even offering a woman that possibility.
So in the meantime, let's get on to my curse, written while driving back from my Thanksgiving holiday and trying to stave off having to go to the restroom.
Posted by Marc Gunn on Monday, December 02, 2002 |
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My CurseLong, long ago I was cursed.
For a man that I am, it's the worst.
Give me a purse
It doesn't matter,
Because I've got a seven year old's bladder.
How it happened, I'm not sure.
But it began when I was a young boy.
A squirt gun toy
Aimed at my knee,
Next think I knew, I had to pee.
But car trips were my greatest fear,
Especially when I wasn't behind the wheel.
I would squeel.
The car would slow
While my dad told me, "Stick it out the window!"
Getting sick was the least fun.
I'd have to pee, but also get the runs.
I'd feel my tum
Gurgle from the flu
I'd have Number One, followed by Number Two.
We've driven long, now I really need for relief.
My girlie bladder is shouting for peace.
I'll turn over a new leaf
But I have to go.
Oh no, I feel the pee starting to flow!
Posted by Marc Gunn on Monday, December 02, 2002 |
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Too Little Sleep, Too Much CaffeineIt was interesting, the time I spent with my Ex-fiancee. I learned a lot about myself. For one, too little sleep and too much caffeine is bad for me. And I wonder how many others suffer from similar problems.
I remember in college spending hours upon hours not getting enough sleep and subsisting on caffeine. But it wasn't still a few years later that I realized caffeine was useless for keeping me up late. Only thing it was good for was making me very jittery. I'd still be exhausted and could pass out at the drop of a hat. But I'd be wired as I passed out.
Then, I also learned that too little sleep was likely to get me sick. Not only was I more prone to my forsworn enemy, sinus infections, I was also more likely to develop asthma and other problems. It wasn't until the last year or so that I realized this and started to correct the error in my ways.
I've done much better since I made the change...well until the last few weeks. Now, I could use a LOT of sleep and just don't get it... But on the bright side, I am drinking less caffeine! ?)
Posted by Marc Gunn on Monday, December 02, 2002 |
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Well
if you have any questions, I'd be happy
to answer those as well.
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Irish Drinking Songs for Cat Lovers
